Gratitude

I’m BACK !

I woke up this morning, a drizzly Sunday morning, the morning after watching a wonderful play by Shakespeare, performed by local talents including my stepson Gabe, and I thought, ‘it’s time to take up blogging again’. This morning, I have fire in my belly (and in my wood stove)  and I’m “sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad” . So dramatic ….but the life I’m living now is so changed, so different, I hardly recognise my dreams, my skin, or my lover and life companion. (more on all that in the next entry)

 

So I found this, my long lost blog site,  and lo and behold!,  there was a saved draft from December 2013 !!! As follows…..

 

 

Today, I made a vow.

I thought that it is about time to think about how little gratitude I have been feeling. So I’m jolting my memory- remembering the great things in my life. And I’m vowing to be grateful for at least one thing a day !

For a start, all I need to look at is my financial position. Compared to even two years ago, I’m blessed with access to a lot more financial resources, and I’m grateful for that. It’s a great feeling when you actually realise, that you are getting closer to some big goals in life ! What a wonderful mind we have- we have the amazing ability to choose what we want to be, how we want to live, and BANG, as long as we have passion for it, we can make it happen. Well, it doesn’t happen overnight (mostly), but we all know how fast a year or two go by and so while we are working passionately towards a goal, feeling fulfilled in the process, we get to savour what we’ve been aiming for. Two times lucky !

Of course there are set-backs, sometimes a few too many. Sometimes we need to change direction, slightly or dramatically, and we need to listen to the signs all around us. Another blessing !

But the more I look at the magical side of life, consciousness, the brilliant people around me, the adoration of my sweet lil dogs, the massive 4 cm growth  (in one day) that my baby tomato plants in the garden achieved, music, humour, – the list is endless, the more I feel that life is a magical forest in which I get to be a unicorn. If I want to.

Blessings all around !   🙂

NIGHTMARE

I’ve decided to share some fairly intimate moments of my investing life- and that includes also very personal experiences.

I have an investing and life partner. He is a kind and industrious man, who is not shy to work hard at what he has decided to work on. But he also is impulsive and likes to keep his options open.

The nightmare  I had some weeks ago as I woke up was about my partner leaving me- in exactly the way my very first boyfriend did when I was sweet 18! He was actually already overseas, and I was visiting him to collect my  dogs. After a while, I had this feeling that he was acting very strangely, so distant, and maybe hiding something from me. In my typically direct way, I asked  straight out-‘Did you meet someone and fall in love ?’

Now, first I have to add that in my dream, my partner was a blonde woman, quite well presented and good looking, but not my type at all.
In real life, my partner has no hair  and being a bit of a greenie, likes wearing second-hand clothing until they naturally compost on him. ( ok, this is meant to be a joke to lighten this blog)

He/she answered with yes, all starry-eyed and singing almost the rest of the sentence-(‘She is like medicine to me and you are like poison’)- then turned away as he/she was getting ready to go out, flicking the blonde curls in an arrogant fashion.

So here we go- having experienced this kind of thing before in real life, my mind ( in the dream) starts racing, making plans about how to separate all the belongings, investment properties, what to say to the children and the neighbors, and what I’ll need to focus on first. Straight into first-aid !

They say, that in dreams we dream of aspects of our own selves. There’s a blonde, middle- aged barbie who tells me, the aspect of the dreamer, that I’m poison??? What am I meant to make of that? It’s probably a blessing that she is going to leave me, and I’m happy for her to have found someone who is medicine to her. Wouldn’t we all love to be with our own personalized bottle of medicine? To have access to a quick swig of the healing drought that soothes all pain and closes all wounds? Someone who is warm when we are cold. Cools us when hot. You can imagine how jealous I was !

My own aspect of middle-age blondie tells me I’m poison? It seems to me that she’s poison to me, and not the other way round. She causes severe jealousy, has inconsiderately fallen in love while still supposedly with me, is extremely rude and short and doesn’t even give me any time to go into shock!!!

I’m completely confused here. Can anyone help me interpret this? I’m open to your suggestions.